So I know I'm supposed to keep this g- rated and stuff right, and speak all proper and wat not...but now is not the time. Someone tief all my gad damn juice out da frigde!
It would've been last week Friday night, I came home from a lil gatherin...had a nice time with the lovey Bahamian folk up here right...HUNGRY! STARVIN! Time nah I say lemme go take off ma clothes, get comfortable ya know...wash ma face and all dat...READY to dig into some nice cold Five Alive and some chips and what not...come out my room, headin to the kitchen...
On my way...I hear somethin ya know...sound like someone breakin ten...man I spin round da corner..don't know what I did that for...lol...ain like I was ga do ntn anyway...but I digress...gone in the kitchen, turn on the light, open the fridge door..I most drop...ALL A MY STINKIN JUICE WHAT I JUST JUST BUY FROM WALMART..GONE! DEM SUCKAS TIEF ERRYTING! Even da spoil cheese wat been dere from King Hammer was a friggin hatchet!...I cudn't believe it...I just buy dem tings from da shop man...boy I was Purple where I was so mad...
I sure y'all know how it is feel when ya have ya mind set on somethin, time nah ya mout waterin, belly growlin, you goin crazy almost, where you tinkin bout dis ting so much...den when ya get dere it ain dere...Lord knows I most burn down this place...da ppl say I must calm down, das only juice...only juice? ONLY JUICE? Dey ain know how dat juice get dere...dey ain give me one red cent fa my juice...talkin mess bout it's only juice...lol..I only cud laugh nah cus it done happen...but y'all cud imagine how pissed off I was...
So I finally catch myself...I say I was ga go lay down catch ma breath...end up fallin sleep..but who please when I wake up da next mornin, sometin tell me go check da fridge...open da door da ppl bring back dat ole dry up bottle a fanta fruit punch but ain bring back none a my damn juice..and dey carry soo much tings..I had 5 bottle a water, Dasani, da good kind, one big bottle a Mott's Juice..da 100% one..3 cans of five alive, and one two litre bottle a coke soda...da whole fridge dey carry...
But I say anyway..das alright, it ga be ok...ppl in da world ain even gat water to drink...I ga be ok...I just want da sucka who tief my juice to know dey betta lock up dey room, cus if I find out...I tiefin erryting back...even ya socks...lol...don't mind me here..I only ventin...
Anyway y'all, it's been real...
This has been Collegeguy.
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lol real yardie talk... but like we say: IT'S JUST JUICE!
ReplyDeleteIt wasn't just juice
ReplyDeleteNow the Dasani they should have taken - 'cause it isn't Aquafina
But I would have been plenty pissed - however juice is not food so I don't know what it would do for the hunger.
Sounds like you need to keep your snacks in your room
Don't want to have to hurt nobody
And the language isn't you dude [come on]
I received a call from The Nassau Guardian about this post. The conversation went like this, "Mr Russell, are you aware that one of your students had their juice stolen?" To which I said to the reporter, "I'm sorry, what are you referring to?" She then said, well, I was reading the blog that you shared with me from one of your brightest students and he was very concerned about his stolen juice. I suggested to her that you must have been very annoyed. She politely inquired if there were other students she might interview to which I said, "At this point, it does not appear that way."
ReplyDeleteInteresting.
ReplyDelete